Friends, I am here today to preach the good news of completely dissociating while running. Okay, maybe not completely dissociating. But largely. And not 100% of the time but, y'know, a lot of the time.
People will be like, "You gotta be fully engaged in the run! You gotta FEEL IT in ur BODY, get ur MIND all INTO IT!" And you know what, if that works for you, great. Get it. Feel your body or whatever. Some of us, though, only have so much mental "in-it-ness" or whatever you want to call it, and we have to be careful about where we spend it.
I've always had a sense that, at least for me, running "hard" (whether that's racing, speed work, tempo runs, or some other workout where you're trying to hit a particular pace) doesn't only take physical effort; it's mentally taxing as well, in the same way that playing a complex and stressful game or taking a timed and detail-oriented entrance exam can be. (Think Chess tournaments, LSAT/MCAT/bar exam, etc.) In addition to being physically rested and recovered, you also need a certain "mental freshness" to do it well. I wasn't sure whether this was just me or a real thing until I read something Shalane Flanagan said about racing marathons:
"In a marathon at the beginning of the race, I tell myself to disassociate, I tune out. I visualize falling asleep. You don’t pay attention. You’re not wasting any energy. You are literally going to go to sleep for 13 miles. And then when 13 miles hits, you’re going to wake up, you’re going to start to pay attention to yourself, to your competitors. There’s a lot more just taking in all of the senses, the smells, the sights, everything becomes way more high-def and fine tuned. But the first half, if I’m not careful, my mental energy will be just exhausted by the time I get to halfway, so to preserve and really get a great race, it’s usually in the second half that I really become fine tuned with everything."
When I read that I went "YES! It's that. It's that exactly." You (or at least, me and Shalane Flanagan) only have so much mental energy you can expend being "in it" and paying close attention to everything you're doing and feeling. You have to use it in the right places or you'll wear yourself out.
I think I used to do this to myself all the time when my anxiety was at its worst. I would spend too much mental energy getting "in it" even while just jogging to the track or warming up or in the early miles of a long run. At the time I thought this was desirable, like "Look at me, I'm sooo focused, not one of those people who just tunes out." But these days it's like, "I'm tired. Ain't nobody got energy for *anything* but the bare minimum. Wake me up when we get to the track."
And you know what? With running, "the bare minimum" is kind of a great way to think about it. My workouts show up in my training calendar and "the bare minimum" is "do what's written to the best of your ability." You don't have to think about it. You don't have to worry about how it's going to go and ruminate and fixate and play what-if-this and what-if-that mind games with yourself. You don't have to assess how it went after or judge yourself or read the tea leaves to try to understand "what it all means" for that race one or two or three months from now.
You literally have to sleep-run your way to the workout, do what's written, and move on with your day.
Grand Total: 36.7 miles
- * 21.7 easy
* 2 speed
* 15 long
Monday 7/22: 6 easy sightseeing around Madrid on my last night. That is, I'm pretty sure this run was *at least* six miles, maybe a little more; some Garmin hijinks were involved.
Tuesday 7/23: On a plane! No running.
Wednesday 7/24: 2.75 warm up, 2 x [2 x (600m / 200m) / 2:30 jog], 3 cool down = 7.75 total. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel the day after getting home, but I seemed to be doing fine so went for the workout instead of an easy run. ~6:25 average pace on the intervals, not super speedy but not terrible either.
Thursday 7/25: 5 easy. Just a little recovery run, plus my first pedicure in maybe six years??? Pre-vaccinations, pedicures just didn't seem worth the risk, and post-vax I feel like I've always had at least one or two missing or effed-up toenails that made me feel like it wasn't even worth it. Blessings upon the young lady who didn't run screaming at the site of my toes & only uttered a few quiet exclamations of awe during the process.
Friday 7/26: 3 easy + 1 hour strength. My typical to-and-from the gym rest day run. After deadlifting 165# a bunch of times & crushing 40 rear-foot-elevated, front-foot-inclined split squats for the first time in a few weeks, my legs were utter jello. The jog home was, um, interesting, really glad it was short!
Saturday 7/27: Rest. I thought I might get in an easy four but ended up cooking all day with friends, no regrets.
Caprese salad with olive oil from Spain, aged balsamic from Italy, and sea salt from Portugal 😋
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